Abuse. Trauma. Healing via Nature and the Old Gods

Yearly Archives: 2017

I woke up this morning to the new trending hashtag #MeAt14 on Twitter. Many of the tweets are just images of girls at 14, who are obviously too young to be in any kind of sexual situation with a man in his 30’s such as Alabama Senate candidate Roy Moore. […]

Yes, This Hurts. So Don’t Waste The Pain

November 13, 2017 in The Christian Cult / Trauma and Recovery tagged #meat14 / #metoo / abuse / Child molester / christianity / christians / evangelicals / Roy Moore / trauma by admin

CW: Non-consensual physical contact, emotional abuse. It could begin over anything. Sometimes it was over some youthful indiscretion on my part. Sometimes, my dad would even be laughing and joking one minute, and the next minute it was as if a switch had flipped and he was full of […]

The Systematic Erasure Of Me

November 6, 2017 in The Christian Cult / Trauma and Recovery tagged abuse / christianity / christians / trauma by admin

On a cold night in December, 1970, a barely 18-year-old girl was dropped off at an unwed mother’s clinic just over the state line from where she lived. Her father watched her get out of the car and then drove away. She was in labor, and nobody other than her […]

Twice Motherless: Adopted by The Morrigan

November 1, 2017 in Trauma and Recovery tagged Adoption / birth mother / Morrigan / Mothers / rejection by admin

If I had $1 for every Christian who, since I left the church, has said to me some version of, “You were hurt by people because you were following traditions/ false doctrines/ human error.. I know better because I know the REAL Jesus…” I’d be Joel Osteen. This morning on […]

It’s Not The People. Christianity Is Toxic

October 27, 2017 in The Christian Cult tagged abuse / bible / christianity / christians / EmptyThePews / individualism / toxic / uniqueness by admin

I distinctly remember a moment when I was perhaps two or three years old. It had occurred to me that my parent’s had stopped saying “I love you,” to me. What did this mean? Had they just forgotten? Had I done something wrong? So tiny little me formulated a plan. […]

Childhood Abuse Becomes Spiritual or Self Abuse

October 26, 2017 in Trauma and Recovery by admin

So it was a rough weekend. My last post mentioned how I was in Western NC for a memorial service, and how anxious I was about seeing my dad again. The day came. He decided to skip the memorial and only show up at the cemetery, “so he wouldn’t make […]

The Healing Waters of Creeks and Streams

October 24, 2017 in My Pagan Path / Pagan Basics tagged anxiety / creeks / fairies / healing / nature / paganism / paganism 101 / ritual / spirits / streams / stress / trauma / water by admin

I’m currently in Western North Carolina for a memorial service for a dear cousin. This will be the first time I’ve seen my dad since I stopped talking to both my parents. After a lifetime of emotional abuse, the final straw was their reaction to learning of a sexual assault […]

I Will Not Be Quiet About My Trauma

October 21, 2017 in My Pagan Path / Trauma and Recovery tagged #metoo / abuse / dad / funerals / parents / trauma by admin

It started in January when I went to the Women’s March in Washington, and was especially strong during my trip to the beach where I met Manannan Mac Lir. I dedicated both trips to The Morrigan, and both times saw an inordinate amount of soaring birds I assumed to be […]

Vultures And The Morrigan

October 11, 2017 in My Pagan Path by admin

With a nod to Mr. Frost… Dappled light through leaves mostly green Pioneers in death Just beginning to fall One by one Spiraling, floating to the forest floor. Who’s Forest this is I know It’s spirit is it’s own This spirit knows me and this spirit I know A […]

Stopping By Woods On A Sunny Morning

October 6, 2017 in Garden Magic / My Pagan Path by admin

So here we are again. The “largest mass shooting in modern American history,” (at least since the last one). And yes, it’s maddening, heartbreaking, tragic, and horrific. Again. It’s also frustrating to see the nonstop barrage of “thoughts and prayers” for the victims offered by many of the leaders who, […]

Stop Insulting Christians For Sending “Thoughts and Prayers.”

October 4, 2017 in Recovering Right Winger by admin

In a dream, I was in a primitive cabin, possibly in the mountains where I grew up. A woman named Molly was sitting in a rocking chair near the hearth, where there was a blazing fire. Molly was clearly a wise woman, and she had something to share with me. […]

Escaping The Fear of Fundamentalism

May 5, 2017 in My UPC Experience / Recovering Right Winger / The Christian Cult / Trauma and Recovery by admin

After coming home from the Women’s March, I reached the point where depression and anxiety made it impossible to do more than put one foot in front of the other each day. I did plant a garden – but that’s been about the only productive thing I’ve done in 2017. […]

Meeting Manannan Mac Lir

April 18, 2017 in My Pagan Path by admin